Guns Up (2025) Kevin James as a Mob Enforcer? Hollywood, You Feeling Okay?

One the brink of leaving "The Family," a mob henchman's final job goes off the rails. With the clock ticking, the ex-cop has one night to get his unsuspecting family out of the city before he gets snuffed out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=em64F7k27ws

Ah, Guns Up - a movie that boldly asks the question no one thought to ask: What if Doug Heffernan joined the mafia, lost his UPS route, and got a black-market Glock instead?

Set over the course of one night - because let’s face it, that’s about how long the script holds up - Guns Up is your typical "one-last-job" story that wants to be gritty but ends up more like the mob movie equivalent of lukewarm soup. Not bad enough to spit out, but not something you’ll crave again either.

Kevin James stars as Ray Hayes, a former cop turned mob enforcer, which sounds like a setup for an SNL sketch but plays it straight. And honestly? He’s not terrible. You believe he’s done some bad things - mostly because you’ve seen what he did to comedy over the past decade. But as a badass hitman? It’s like watching your high school gym teacher try Krav Maga: unexpected, occasionally impressive, and slightly embarrassing.

The plot, or the suggestion of one, is simple: Ray's on the cusp of retirement when his final job blows up like a malfunctioning espresso machine at a mobster’s cafe. Now he’s got one night to get his family the hell outta Dodge before the bad guys descend like Black Friday shoppers on a flat-screen TV aisle.

Christina Ricci, playing Ray’s wife, brings that signature Ricci mix of wide-eyed confusion and simmering rage. She spends most of the movie oscillating between disbelief and blood-lust, which feels oddly accurate for a woman finding out her suburban husband moonlights as Tony Soprano’s JV cousin. She gets in some licks, too - though thank you, Hollywood, for finally realizing that if you're gonna make 120-lb actresses take on goons built like refrigerators, at least give them blunt instruments. A frying pan, a shovel, a well-aimed wine bottle - whatever it takes to suspend disbelief.

And then there’s Timothy V. Murphy. Sweet Irish thunder, this guy chews scenery like it owes him money. Murphy is the kind of bad guy who doesn’t just kill you - he judges you while he does it. He’s got that raspy menace that sounds like whiskey gargled over broken glass. If Guns Up had more of him and less of the slow pacing, we might be talking cult classic instead of streaming filler.

Luis Guzmán also pops up for a paycheck - I mean, a supporting role - and brings his usual likable “Hey, I know that guy!” energy. Honestly, he could’ve played the villain, the neighbor, or the bartender, and it all would've worked.

There is one absolutely killer moment in this otherwise so-so tale: the final battle. It’s like the movie realized it was on life support and yanked out the IV to go out with a bang. Kevin James - yes, that Kevin James - unleashes a beatdown that, while not Bourne-level choreography, is surprisingly gritty. Blood, bullets, hand-to-hand brawling - it’s the kind of climax that almost makes you forget how slow the first hour was.

Almost.

Let’s talk dialogue. Most of it is as forgettable as microwave pizza, but one line sparkled like a diamond in a pile of broken glass:

Henry Hayes: “Is Dad John Wick?”

Siohbán Hayes: “I think our dad married John Wick.”

That line alone deserves its own spin-off. Or a T-shirt.

But here’s the problem: Guns Up is a slow burn, and I mean molasses-on-a-winter-day slow. The kind of pacing that makes you check the runtime more often than your pulse during a meditation app. The film flirts with style and substance, but never fully commits to either. And while the characters are serviceable, you’ll likely forget who did what the minute the credits roll - kind of like trying to remember your cousin’s wedding playlist three months later.

It’s not a bad movie. It’s just aggressively average. Like store-brand cereal with a cool box. The ingredients are there - mob tension, flawed hero, family stakes, shootouts, and kitchen-based violence - but the final product is more “binge while folding laundry” than “cancel plans to watch.”

Final Verdict:

6.0/10

Not quite a hit, not quite a miss—Guns Up is the kind of movie that takes aim, fires, and grazes the target. It won’t go down as a classic, but it might land on your “eh, why not?” watchlist when the chips are gone and the couch is comfy.

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